| my kitchen flooded... |
[Sep. 20th, 2009|01:20 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  indifferent | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Mozart Operatic Overtures! ASMF, Marriner | ] |
Emotions. They're a delicate thing. It's complex. Confusing. Just what is their purpose? Why do we have emotions?
For the longest time I've tried very hard to ignore my emotions. I've been reprogramming my brain to keep cutting down on listening to my emotions. They're not always your best friend as they're known to cloud one's judgment. Emotions are naturally built to override one's logic and rationality. At least we're born that way, then we move away from them. In a time of difficulty, one's brain becomes more efficient by doing what is necessary instead of giving into what it wants. One of the most difficult things to learn as a human being is to make cold decisions when it is necessary. What you must do sometimes isn't what you want, just like what you want isn't always the best thing for you. Truth is, life is full of off roads and bad cards. For the most of us on this planet, we suffer greatly whether it's through an emotional pain or physical one, perhaps both. As we grow older we learn to become less and less emotional... on the outside. In our culture, we learn to hide ourselves VERY well. We're taught to smile and always reply with a "I'm fine. How are you?". It's a strange phenomenon, yet it makes sense when you think about why we lie to ourselves daily. Giving into one's emotions they say, is a sign of weakness. It's as if we're all secretly trying to become like Spock. In fact he is the perfect example of what we strive to become as human beings. We want to be able to make the BEST possible decision using logic and only logic. Even if it means completely ignoring our emotions. If the humans continue to evolve and advance, the rise of the Vulcans is, at least in my mind, inevitable. We may not end up looking like them, but we will have most of their qualities in every facet of life--especially in the way we use our minds and the way we view life.
As someone who is BEYOND fascinated and moved by the study of the cosmos and everything related to its being (which I guess includes you, me, this computer monitor you're staring at, the whales in the ocean, Hugh Hefner's need to sleep with 20 year olds, the underdeveloped brains of the religious fanatics, the fact that you remember the smell of your mom's cooking from 5th grade... in short, EVERYTHING), I understand that the universe as Carl Sagan puts, is "merely indifferent". When that asteroid finally shows up on Earth to wipe away all its living things, it's not as if the universe is trying to punish us, or has some kind of vendetta against us. When life began on Earth as single celled organisms only to evolve to create us humans, who enjoys eating good food, listening to good music, sleeping with good (or sometimes not good) looking people, and making beautiful poopoo in the bathroom, the universe wasn't out to reward us or give us a lending hand. At least not on purpose. Of course no one is 110% sure of this "indifferent" notion, but this is what our collective brain is telling us. And by brain, I mean the ones working.
So you learn how the stars form. You learn how the stars die. You learn as much as you can about everything in between. And when you do, you realize we're SO connected to the act of the cosmos. In fact, we ARE the cosmos. We come from this stuff and once we're done thinking, we will go back to this stuff. The moment we die, our body disintegrates back into the Earth. Soon or later we will burn inside the sun and be spewed back out into the cosmos. Some of you reading this entry will be floating one day in the middle of the Andromeda, and some of us will still be floating in the Milky Way. Either way, we will be one with the universe as we once were and we still are right at this moment. It is a beautiful cycle. Every part of our body will be used for something down the road. Perhaps some parts of yourself will be part of another living creature in a planet far away from here. It is a possibility. The universe does what it needs to do. It does what it must do. Simply put, it does what it does. The universe, much like "God", works in mysterious ways.
But the cosmos is not like us. These "decisions" are not mere "decisions". They're ripples of a massively complex sets of domino effects started from the supposed "Big Bang". These events are a part the never ending cycle of cause and effect. Perhaps one could argue that OUR decisions are mere domino effects too. And in a sense, they are. But I could DECIDE to ignore the cause and ALTER the effect any time I want. Whereas the cosmos will not stop an asteroid heading for Earth just for shits and giggles. If there's one heading our way with only 5 days away from impact, it WILL hit us. It is not EVIL, it is not the ANTI-CHRIST, it is not sent to us by someONE or someTHING. This act seems cold to us. It seems MEAN and CRUEL to us human beings. We're not used to this word "indifferent" because WE are not indifferent. We feel things. And we feel them HARD. We are SO passionate about our feelings that we often do things that go COMPLETELY against our better judgment. We end lives and we end ourselves because of these feelings. But that is EXACTLY what makes who we are. After so many months and years of trying desperately to ignore my emotions, I've come to realize that my FEELINGS are the BEST part of being who I am. It's the BEST of the BEST of what the universe has to offer. And WE get to have it. A good friend of mine once told me that we are a metaphor for the universe trying to understand itself. If so, then our emotions must be tied down to part of that "understanding".
Feeling the biggest pain can reward us with the ability to feel the biggest victory. The harder you stretch one way, the farther it will fly the other way. The Chinese knew what they were saying when they spoke of the yin and yang. The extremes of emotions and everything in between is what we live for. If we simply made decisions based only on logic and lived our lives by it, our existence would not be any different from that of a plant, a planet, a star, and all the other things in this universe which resembles a rock. We would go about our day doing what we have to do without having the choice to run off from the beaten trail. The greatest adventures in life are experienced when you run off the trail, diving into the unknown. Without imagination, without creativity, without our crazy unrealistic hopes, we would never soar above what is expected of us. It is the greatest gift I feel we have as human beings.
Music is the highest form of expressing this emotion of our's. I feel as though the act of making music then becomes the highest form of existence in this universe. You know what this means? Next time someone asks me "why did you want to become a musician?", I'll have an answer waiting for them. And they'll think I'm nuts. There's nothing I want from life more than people thinking I'm nuts. Seriously, what could be better? Mmm pie...
"If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe."
--Carl Sagan
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| Oh Silly Update |
[Aug. 30th, 2009|11:44 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Mozart Linz Symphony--Kleiber vs. MacKerras... OOOH... | ] |
This is not a "blog" as most people see it. This is my personal diary. Yes, I write what I think. I write about what I experience in life. I share my inner thoughts. I'm honest and I try to be as open as possible. From my point of view, I have nothing to hide. I'm not ashamed of myself and of what I think. Ultimately I write for myself and myself only, as I've kept a diary since 1990. For several years now, I've used the livejournal medium because it is an easy way to keep a personal diary and it stores everything online away from a possible crashing of my hard drives. It also allows me to include photos as part of my diary which is just great. I realize many people have read my past entries and I welcome that mainly because (1) some people enjoy reading what I have to say (2) my life is an open book and I'm happy to share what I write for myself. It is my hope that I will continue to keep a diary of some form until the day I can no longer think. I find great pleasure in reading my old entries. Especially the ones written in Korean from the early 90's. Those are pure GOLD. I'm still the same person--the only difference is that I used to write about what I did each day and now I write about what's on my mind. Oh yea, and they used to call me Kim Do Hoon back in the day. Not Anthony Kim. Fascinating stuff.
It has become evident that my diary is now as good as dead. Looking back at the archives, I see that I wrote one entry in May of 2009. I wrote another in June. This is the first one since then. A lot has happened since June, yet I haven't written a single word about it. I just don't have the inner drive to write anymore. It's not that I don't have anything to write about. If anything, it's the opposite. I feel there is a major change occurring within me and I'm thinking about many different things. But I'm just thinking about them. I have no desire to write them down. Scary thing is, my short term memory has been slipping this past year. Very badly. I'm a little concerned to be honest. I am getting old. Oy...
The summer's been very good. I am generally very content and happy. I am broke as of right now and have no way of paying for my next rent but I am still very happy. I spent a marvelous July in Maine studying with one of the best conducting pedagogues in the world. I met a great number of truly wonderfully gifted human beings while in Maine. I'm glad to have spent my time with these people who I am proud to call friends. It was one of the best experiences of my life both musically and otherwise. I'm at the moment gearing up for the upcoming academic year... mentally preparing myself for the griding schedule and practicing for my two recitals. I've decided to apply for grad conducting programs THIS year. There is no way in hell I'd want to spend another year in Santa Barbara after I finish my first MM. Especially being out of school, with no income. I LOVE Santa Barbara and the people I am surrounded by. But I am very much ready to leave. I've checked out of the piano world awhile ago in my head and I'm excited and anxious to give my all to conducting. I'm going into my seventh year as a Santa Barbarian and it's the longest I've lived in one single place since being born. Second on the list is La Jolla with only 2 years of residency. Seven is a big number to my brain and I can tell she is longing for something new. I want an adventure and I want to conduct. I am SO ready to begin. After seeing who and what I'm against, I'm confident and anxious to begin my journey.
Despite my excitement in moving on from piano and Santa Barbara, I still have one year left and I plan on having the best year yet. I've had pretty rough undergraduate years at UCSB for various reasons, but last year as a graduate student I managed to get all A's with a 3.9+ GPA. I'm very happy with my academic work last year and I intend to keep it that way. I'm planning on taking orchestration starting this fall and more score reading classes even though they are not "required" courses for MM in piano. If it's going to help me become a better musician and conductor, I am all for it. I will continue my work as the music director of the South Coast Reading Orchestra this year as well as continuing my work with the UCSB Symphony. I was told I'll be conducting in each one of the UCSB Symphony concerts this academic year starting with Witch's Ride from Humperdinck's Hansel and Gretel. I'm very much looking forward to it. Recently I was invited to become a guest clinician for a local junior high school orchestra. I don't know yet what the work entails but I am very excited about the opportunity.
First thing I'm going to do when I'm done with UCSB is apply for a staff position at Camp Cherry Valley on Catalina Island. It's a summer camp location for Boy Scouts of America, San Gabriel Valley Council. I spent one of the best weeks of my life at Camp Cherry Valley over a decade ago before I became a first class scout. There I learned to dive for the very first time, I swam half a mile out in the ocean, I swam with the sharks in the open water, I went on war canoe races against Samoans, hiked a bunch, and spent quality time with fellow scouts. If they accept my application I'll be working as a camp counselor, teaching merit badges to boy scouts (hopefully the music merit badge!), teaching scout skills, working as a lifeguard, inspecting docks and campsites, planning and performing skits, running tournaments, races, aqua olympics, etc. It's a 10-week long summer program and each week a new batch of dozen or so boy scout troops come in from all over the country to train and compete against each other. In total there are about 500 new scouts that come through each week. Perhaps even more. I have such fond memories from my boy scout summer camps, from Lost Valley to Cherry Valley to Emerald Bay. I would very much like to work as a camp staff before I get too old and get bogged down with life.
And finally and probably MOST importantly, I'm proud to say my Los Angeles Lakers are the 2009 NBA Champs. It's probably THE reason why I am so happy these days. After what we went through post Shaq-era, this victorious season is UNBELIEVABLY sweet. Kobe finally got his 4th title and Phil Jackson achieved the unthinkable by attaining his 10th--the most ever by an NBA coach. This upcoming season is looking MIGHTY promising with the addition of Ron Artest. Words can't describe how excited I am for the 2009-2010 season.
On that note, I shall end this entry with photos from this summer... ( las fotos del dia! )
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| Artur Rubinstein, my best friend... |
[May. 11th, 2009|12:41 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Beethoven Eroica Symphony--Sir John Eliot Gardiner | ] |
Reaching the end of a book is like saying good bye to a friend... when reading biographies, you feel this by a tenfold. After reading Artur Rubinstein's autobiography, it feels as though I've lost my best friend. Today I read the last pages of this giant two-volume set filled with adventures and passions of Rubinstein's rich life. It must've been well over a thousand pages... I started reading the first volume, My Young Years two summers ago in New York when I was at Bard. I started the second volume, My Many Years soon after but I took a huge break from reading because well, let's just say the second volume isn't as good as the first. Either way I can confidently say that I enjoyed this book more than perhaps any other that I've read in a long long time (outside of Sagan's Cosmos).
( Read more... )
These concerts remind me of a funny little quarrel with Heifetz. He bitterly resented that all the publicity bore the names Rubinstein, Heifetz, Piatigorsky--always in the same order. "Why can't we change it and give each one of us a chance to be the first-named"? said Jashca.
"I couldn't care less," I answered indifferently, "but as far as I know, all trios are published for piano, violin, and violincello, and it is the tradition to publicize the players in this order."
Jascha didn't want to give in so soon. "I have seen some trios printed for violin and violincello, accompanied by the piano," he said.
"They must have been printed by yourself, Jascha."
"What do you mean?" he said indignantly. "I've really seen them."
I began to see red. "Jascha," I shouted, "if God played the violin, it would still be printed Rubinstein, God, and Piatigorsky." No reply from Jascha. But we did make records of those three trios and put much work and love into them.
--From My Many Years
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| the unquestioned ANSWER |
[Apr. 24th, 2009|03:23 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Dvorak Slavonic Dances STUCK in my head!!! | ] |
It's been awhile since I've updated my journal. Not too much has happened in the recent days, it's pretty much the same old routine of waking up in the morning, hunting for food, then going right back to sleep. Well, something like that.
I had my official conducting debut on Monday with the UCSB Symphony Orchestra. I conducted Ives' Unanswered Question and my friend (and roommate) Justin Aftab's Hypothesis, which won the UCSB orchestral composition competition this year. The concert was part of the "Primavera" week which we have at UCSB annually. The Primavera Festival is geared toward the "new" music from the 20/21st centuries. The concert went fairly well considering I only had 3 weeks to rehearse this tricky piece. The work is not tonal at ALL and there is CONSTANT meter change... at least one every other measure. The Hypothesis sounds very much like a work written by Berg, which is not surprising considering Justin listens to Berg in the shower (in the dark mind you) AND before going to bed (usually right before the sun comes up). It was fascinating working with the composer himself... we worked on it together during the spring break going measure by measure, discussing what he wanted and how I would go about rehearsing certain passages. It's interesting to note that I conducted two pieces on this concert and both of their titles essentially have the same meaning; "The Unanswered Question" and "The Hypothesis". I will be conducting Justin's piece once again in the final concert of the year with the UCSB Symphony.
My reading orchestra is getting better and better in every way. Tonight's jam session was especially rewarding for me, as it was for the rest of the musicians. The level of orchestra is going up each time we get together. Tonight we played through Mozart's 40th in G minor and Dvorak's Slavonic Dances, Op. 46. We had a nice turn out in the string section with about 8 in each violin 1 and 2, which is probably the most we've had so far in one session. The winds are getting beefed up as of late. We still need another oboe and a bassoon, but otherwise I'm fairly certain my wind section is the best one in town outside of the professional groups. I have the luxury of having the best wind players from UCSB music department playing as principals in my orchestra. And tonight we had a new principal clarinet, who turned out to be quite excellent. Apparently she has a graduate degree in clarinet performance from Yale of all places, now studying psychology at UCSB. Between our new clarinet, Ray on flute, Eri on Oboe, and Lyndy on Bassoon, I feel quite spoiled as a conductor. I rarely have to tell them much, and when I do, they're able to adapt right on the spot. I'm going to see if we could move our rehearsal space to a bigger hall, possibly one on campus because the orchestra size is nearing 50 at this point. And I'm also considering changing the orchestra name to "Santa Barbara Repertory Orchestra". I am not a fan of the current name, "South Coast Reading Orchestra". Whoever came up with it, SHAME ON YOU.
I had to turn down a student last week and it was my first time saying no to someone. I'm just WAY too busy at this point to take on another. I currently have 10 students that I teach weekly; 3 on violin and 7 on piano. I spend all my energy on Fridays and Sundays teaching and when I'm done, it's not fun practicing in small white rooms. Especially if my students come unprepared and walk into their lessons acting as if nothing is wrong. It's funny though, there is an opposite effect when the student comes prepared and we have a good lesson. I have one extraordinary student who I've been teaching for the last three months. This guy came to me without ever having one single music lesson in his life. After about dozen lessons, he's playing Bach Invention No. 1 up to tempo with NO PROBLEM at all. We're talking about phrasing and playing with the Bach "touch". It's really quite impressive how quickly he is learning. I wished he would have started earlier in his life, he would have been quite a talent. No question about it.
I have an interesting conducting assignment coming up for me next Sunday. I was asked if I would go rehearse the Orchestra da camera at the Colburn School. Of course I said yes, not only because it is a wonderful opportunity, but to conduct an orchestra at the newly built Colburn School would simply be kickass. I have about one week to learn Beethoven's 6th and Wagner's Siegfried Idyll. It would be great if I could do this more often, perhaps down the road, it could lead to me conducting the colburn orchestra da camera in a concert? You never know.
p.s. Lakers in 5. Book it! |
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| Thoughts on "eccentric" artists... |
[Feb. 19th, 2009|11:13 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | SHOSTAKOVICH IX -- VPO & BERNSTEIN | ] |
People go around saying that artists are "crazy" or "eccentric" and that it's okay because they're "artists". It's probably true that artists tend to be a little more "off" than the others. But I'm not sure that's really the case. Maybe it's the others who are "off". I like to think that there are two kinds of "crazy" artists; the ones who really are crazy with an emotional maturity of a child and the ones who CHOOSE to be crazy, as in the ones who refuse to give into the norms of their society...
( Read more... ramblings... ) |
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| A Day to Remember... |
[Feb. 6th, 2009|09:50 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Beethoven Piano Concerti with Szell & Fleisher | ] |
February 5th, 2009 will be a day to remember.
I finally received my green card from the US government. It took us so many trying years... no one will understand what a relief this is for me. This is a TREMENDOUS news for myself and for my family. I should really be jumping up and down, but it hasn't quite sunk in yet. I wasn't expecting to get it to be honest, especially so soon... this is a rather huge surprise to me.
( Read more... )
 I know exactly how you feel Kob'. |
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| Where is your mama and papa from??? |
[Jan. 31st, 2009|02:27 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  melancholy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Liszt Auf Dem Wasser Zu Singen Perahia | ] |
Mama & Papa.
Where does it come from? There must be some kind of an explanation for this. Isn't it fascinating that all cultures and ethnicity we know of share the "Ma" sound for our female mothers and the "Pa" sound for our male fathers?
In Korean, mom is "umma" and dad is "appa". It's been that way for thousands of years, even before any of the foreigners ever came through our motherland. It can't be a coincidence that we all share this similarity... seeing how this seems to be the case throughout the planet.
So I guess I've come to some possibly conclusions. The most plausible answer would be that we all originated from the same spot on Earth, where before we became thousands and millions, someone decided that it would be "mama" and "papa". And as we spread out and kept reproducing, the "M & P" sounds stuck around... and now we have variations of these M & P sounds spread throughout the world.
Another very good possibility is that the M sound in our brain symbolizes the maternal instincts whereas the P sound stand for the masculine protector. And it's the most natural sounds we make as infants, which also makes Ma and Pa sounds some of the first sounds we ever make... therefore it has stuck around oh so naturally through the beauty of evolution...
I'm sure there's a good answer to all this. I just don't know it myself and I've been wondering for awhile now... and so far no one's answered it yet. |
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| Music as a time capsule... |
[Jan. 25th, 2009|03:26 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  cold | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Bach Partita IV Pires | ] |
Images and photos bring back memories. Certain smells bring back memories too... and occasionally so does food...
But nothing brings back memories like music.
( More ramblings... )
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| Oooobama? |
[Jan. 24th, 2009|07:35 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  annoyed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | @$%^#&^*&$^%&%^$ | ] |
So I just woke up from a SUPER surreal dream hangin' out with President Obama... unfortunately I have to keep this post short because we have studio class in an hour, but DAMN that was amazing. It was as real as the dreams I've had hangin' out with Carl Sagan and Arthur Rubinstein. The president was visiting Santa Barbara for the first time, and somehow he knew all about me and wanted to ask me some questions about the Music Academy of the West, apparently he was trying to help them find a new faculty member for guitar performance. He asked if I had some time, and if so to come talk to him for a bit... I followed him to a local super market where he went to greet everyone. When he was done touring the town, we walked to his car as he asked some more random questions. While we were walking I realized I was kinda far from home, so I asked him if I could get a lift back to my place. He agreed and instead of walking into his new Caddy, he led me into a secret parking lot behind the super market where we ran into his baby. It was a souped-up orange '93 Mustang with racing blue lines and a phat spoiler! It was a WICKED piece of work. Strangely there were no secrete service men or anyone else for that matter. It was just us two in his playboy acquisition from the early 90s. No one could see us though because the windows were mad tinted and there were also only two seats in the car (racing seats too). As we drove back to my place, he talked to me about some RANDOM personal things that I never told him about... but somehow he knew some of my difficulties and he tried consult me, encouraging me to keep fighting on. Before I got out the car he offered me to work for him if I ever decided to try something else besides music. He said he would love for me to work for him at the White House as one of his assistants or as someone who interviews the incoming assistants... I woke up at that moment as I was trying to think of what to say to him. And now I must run to the music building in pouring rain. This is one part of SB I will NOT miss. The godawful Saturday morning studio classes...
( What a coincidence! )
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| The Dead Composers Society |
[Jan. 21st, 2009|11:12 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | The Voice of Stu Lantz & Joel Meyers on KCAL9 | ] |
Last week I hosted a "Brahms Pizza Party" for the university orchestra after the Wednesday string sectional. I brought in a DVD of Brahms 2nd symphony (Vienna Phil/Kleiber) as well as a DVD of Mendelssohn Violin Concerto (Chicago/Solti & Chung Kyung Wha) from my library since they were two of the pieces we're working on for the winter concert. We brought in drinks and ordered a load of pizzas for the whole orchestra. We have in our concert hall a large screen that pulls down from the ceiling and a nice projector from the sound room above, so I thought what better way to make use of it than to have a viewing party! On Wednesday night the concert hall turned into a movie theater as we watched Kleiber appear before us on the giant screen. The party was a huge success and when I suggested to some of the musicians that we do this more often, Maxenkoff suggested that we make a club out of it. Then I found out the university will give us $300 a year for funding (aka food) if we do form an official club. (!!!)
Tonight after the orchestra rehearsal, we had a meeting between some of the core members of Team D.O.R.A. to fill out the paperwork to form this mighty awesome club. We decided on the club officers, our mission objectives, our tentative schedule, etc. I am officially the founder and the artistic director of the club, our plans will include not only watching performance DVDs on the giant screen and talking about musicians and orchestras, but also planning group outings to the concerts in the Santa Barbara area, as well as using the club meetings as a performance opportunity for the music majors at UCSB--both solo and chamber groups. Basically it's going to be a classical music nerd's paradise. And I'm going to make sure it becomes JUST that. And check this... the coolest part of the club is the name:
"The Dead Composers Society"
It's such a wicked name I TOTALLY love it... some of the other names suggested were "The Prokofiev Club", "The Beethovenites" (no, i wasn't the one who suggested this one), "The Rites of Spring" (LMAO), and "The Philharmonic Society"... and I think the best name won. :) After we find a faculty sponsor (which we already did) and get the form signed, we submit it to the Associated Students office, and soon enough we will become an official club at UCSB! After I'm long gone from this place, the club will still be here spreading the love of classical music to the entire UCSB community. This is very exciting... I can't wait until we get approved! |
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| Anticipating another wasted summer... |
[Jan. 20th, 2009|02:05 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  calm as a storm | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Schubert D960 John Perry | ] |
I started working on the application for the Pierre Monteux School this week and I have to say I feel rather helpless. I don't even see the point in applying anymore. I just crunched some numbers, and realistically there's really no hope for me to come up with the money to pay for it all. Tuition is $2500, travel expenses should come to another $1500, food and random expenses will be about $500, buying orchestral scores will cost me another few hundred bucks if not more. So I'm looking at around $4500 total cost for the program if I get in. They do offer limited financial aid, but I'm sure I'll still need to come up with at least $3500... at BEST I'm going to have only $1000 saved up by the time summer starts.
At least I'm not in a situation like last year where I couldn't even pay my summer rent... that was really tough... if I can't somehow come up with the money for the conducting program, this is going to be another wasted summer for me. Last year I got into Medomak, but I couldn't go because of the same god damn reason. I saved as much as I could all year hoping to go somewhere this summer... but with all the unexpected thousands of dollars spent on family and immigration bullshit, here I am looking at another summer in SB. I worked damn hard to save too, and I watched it all go down the drain for things I had no control over. And I haven't even purchased my eye glasses yet (even though everything's a complete blur and I'm dizzy half of the day staring into the distance), not to mention taking care of my wisdom teeth. That shit's gonna cost me and I've been waiting over 2 years now to come up with the money for it. I can take the pain and the crooked teeth if it means saving money to go study at the Pierre Monteux School.
I just hate all the richass spoiled bastards out there who get to go to these things without worrying about a thing. I know dozens of 'em. I met a load of them too at Bard couple summers ago. Just a bunch of stuck up preppy east coast sons of bitches. On top of it all, they sucked. Well, most of them did anyway. Good for them for having a daddy and a mommy to pay for it all. I hope they're fuckin happy.
In the worst case scenario, I've already been chosen to be a staff/mentor at a special summer program at UCSB for gifted high school students from around the country. I'm not sure what it's called, but the professor in charge of the program asked me to work for her if I am here this summer. So that should take care of my rent (hopefully). I'll still be conducting the reading orchestra throughout the summer months as well as teaching my private students... so it won't be as bad as it was last year.
Wait, who am I kidding?
The rep at Pierre Monteux this summer includes Brahms 3, Mahler 5 and Tchaik 5.
*pause*... okay, Let me say that again now that I've changed my pants.
Brahms 3. Mahler 5. Tchaik 5.
Let's be frank here. If I miss out, I'm probably going to become VERY suicidal. |
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| My debut with my first own orchestra... |
[Jan. 9th, 2009|03:05 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Prokofiev Classical Symphony - Berlin Philharmonic, Ozawa | ] |
Well I'm gonna have to say that was a success. It turned out as well as I thought it could have... the veteran members of the orchestra were VERY pleased. Some of them were amazed that I was able to put together a full symphony in such a short period. They were very appreciative of the fact that they were able to play in a full ensemble unlike in the years past. When they hired me as their new conductor, there were only about 12 remaining members. I filled in every hole except the timpani, and today we had almost 40 musicians show up. We were so much bigger than expected that we barely fit in the rehearsal room!
For the first reading session we read through Schubert's Unfinished and Beethoven's 1st Symphony. The orchestra's playing level was far above what I had imagined. We were able to play at performance speed without too much trouble. I am VERY pleased with this ensemble. I have no complaints and the members of the orchestra were SO kind to me. This ensemble is going to force me to pump out repertoire, learning at least 2 symphonies per month on top of my other assignments... and for two full hours, I get quality podium time with a 40-piece ensemble. This is a student conductor's dream.
And yes, I've decided on the layout. And we are now at:
http:// orchestra.beethovenite.com
There's a chamber orchestra that may be forming in the next one month or so... I am handpicking every single musician and I'm confident that it will be the best non-professional chamber orchestra north of Los Angeles. This orchestra will give concerts and we will have regular rehearsals... every single person I've asked to be in the orchestra has said yes so far. Including everyone's favorite music history professor at UCSB! If this works out, I'm going to have no life whatsoever. Before the year's over if everything works out as planned, I'll be conducting 4 orchestras regularly and guest conducting 1 or 2 other orchestras. I seem to get more work done whenever I am busy anyway. So this is good.
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| Bernstein's closing player from Kaddish Symphony |
[Dec. 20th, 2008|02:27 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  last page of bernstein bio... | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Shostakovich Babi Yar Haitink | ] |
We have both grown older, You and I.
And I am not sad, and You must not be sad.
Unfurrow your brow; look tenderly again
At me, at us, at all these children
Of God here in this sacred house.
And we shall look tenderly back to You.
O my Father: Lord of Light:
Beloved Majesty: my Image, my Self!
We are one, after all, You and I;
Together we suffer, together exist.
And forever will recreate each other.
Recreate, recreate each other!
Suffer, and recreate each other!
R.I.P. LENNY
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| Strange thoughts... |
[Dec. 15th, 2008|10:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blank | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Mahler X Rattle | ] |
I think it's interesting to note that when I'm making music, my physical pains and illnesses disappear for that brief moment. I can cough endlessly for 24 hours, but when I sit down and launch into a Beethoven sonata, somehow the coughing stops immediately until the piece is over. I've always known this about myself, but the more I read about others musicians, I find this to be the case for almost everyone. And as you might have guessed it, I find this to be quite fascinating...
In the past one year or so I've seriously wondered about what I would have done if I had not gone into music. No, I'm not saying I'm actually thinking about changing my field... though, the truth is I never actually "decided" at any point that I'm going to become a professional musician. It just happened very naturally over many years. I never had to "think" about what I wanted to do... but obviously that wasn't an issue because I was never dissatisfied with studying music, nor am I now. Nonetheless, I find this questioning process to be rather entertaining and perhaps even necessary. It all began when I got heavily into reading Carl Sagan and studying about the universe. I don't have the greatest background in physics, but I think I would have gone full throttle into it--failure or not--had it not been for music.
Another fascination I have is with sharks. I think it would have become boring after awhile, but I would still love to tag along on a boat ride with a scientist to help gather data, even if it means jumping in the water. I have a rather unhealthy obsession with building my own shark cage... I've been watching this show on Animal Planet all day today... called "Whale Wars". This reality show follows a group called the Sea Shepherd Conservation Society, which is a 3-vessel fleet that ventures out into the sea to protect ocean animals. Well, I'm totally up for joining their cause. Their organization and leadership is whack. But I think that is something I can help bring to the table. They have the drive, resources and the bodies... it's unfortunate because I find a number of their crew to be completely incompetent. Some of them are borderline pirate wannabes who really should not even be on the ship. I love the ocean, and being outdoors interacting with mother nature is as orgasmic to my brain as listening to a Mahler symphony. Once I finish my graduate degrees and complete the immigration process, I think I would strongly consider joining them, even if it's for just a couple of months.
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| The 50 Questions to Rule them ALL... |
[Dec. 11th, 2008|09:42 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | SILENCE | ] |
I have never done this on my blog. When I see other people post these things, I always find it rather pointless and borderline childish. Well I am doing it. So that makes me childish. But it's okay, I kinda knew that already...
( 50 Random Questions )
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| MAKING A PACT |
[Dec. 10th, 2008|11:26 pm] |
I am making a pact right here on my blog. This is a public pact I am making with myself. I am going to stop overeating each meal. Once in awhile, I'll go out and eat with my friends, and that's fine... but I am going to STOP overeating when I am cooking for myself, whether it's the only meal of the day or not. Junk food needs to be cut in half, and I will say no to Tracy when she lures me in with "aww anthony let's go to micky deeees!" (sorry twathie). I'm also going to make an effort to eat at least twice a day. And lastly, I'm going running with Justin as much as I can.
I'm feelin' like shit and I'm also looking worse than ever before. I am bound for a stroke or a heart attack SOON. So this madness has GOT to stop. This starts NOW. |
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| I want to remember this... |
[Dec. 8th, 2008|06:41 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Chopin - Trois Nouvelle Etudes - Louis Lortie, Piano | ] |
There's really no purpose to this entry except that I want to express my total complete happiness right now. Yes. I am smiling as I'm writing this entry.
( Who woulda thought I'd be this happy right now? )
Apparently I'm in the holiday greetings card for the music faculty this year... what an adorable card... oh winter in Southern California... |
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| Once you go Abbado, you never go back... |
[Oct. 25th, 2008|11:35 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | ROSSINI OVERTURES CHICAGO SYMPHONY SOLTI | ] |
After you listen to Solti for awhile, it's hard to go back and listen to the other sloppy conductors. You get used to his scary good precision. And it's not only that I love it, but after listening to bunch of slobfests, you end up really APPRECIATING Solti. There's something about his sound... Szell is just as precise as Solti (if not better), but his recordings tend to sound cold. Solti's sound is always inviting and SO full of life. There's so much brilliance and power in the Chicago sound, not just in the brass section but with the strings as well. I LOVE that initial attack on Solti's sound. There's that good BITE to his sound without having it sound too aggressive. He's really got it down to a science. I still remember watching the news back in 7th grade when they announced Solti's death. That's how I met him... why is it that all my favorites are long gone? Abbado is quickly becoming my favorite. Actually I think he IS my favorite now. I was sure MTT was my favorite living conductor for a couple years, but I think I'm going to have to unseat Mr. Thomas. The combination of Italian blood and Viennese training has me convinced that Abbado is perhaps the greatest conductor and interpreter of all time. Anything he touches ends up being GOLD. His versatility is unrivaled, his sense of style and temperament cannot be improved upon. I just love how Italian he is when it comes to taking his time, juicing EVERY drop out of a phrase. You gotta love that. I am ALL for cheese.  Painting by Norman Perryman
I'm having the best quarter at UCSB. There are still issues with the paperwork, but on the academic side of things I couldn't be more satisfied. I am busier than ever before, I really think this is the busiest quarter I've had in terms of schedule. I am literally booked ENTIRE week except Friday which I leave open for my private students. I'm TAing two courses this quarter; university orchestra and the orchestral conducting course. Last week I taught my first conducting class. I had a BLAST, we were laughing and learning the entire time. It's the first year conducting course for the music majors, and we use the Max Rudolf book as a reference. It has to be the most exciting class offered at this university, even more exciting than the ball room dance class!
I'm sitting principal second violin this year in the orchestra, this is my first time NOT playing the melody in YEARS. It's a strange move I tell ya after years of playing the melody in the 1st. But I think this will only help my conducting because now I'm able to listen more carefully sitting in middle of all the chaos. I'm being bombarded with conducting assignments this quarter. I began studying the Mendelssohn Reformation Symphony about a month ago, I'm finally around to getting comfortable with it. I think I'll began conducting the university orchestra in rehearsals in a week or two. I cannot wait, we're sounding half way decent this year! This week I'm starting on the Schumann Rhenish and Vaughan Williams "The Wasps". I have to work with the SB Youth Symphony in 2 weeks on the Schumann and Richard invited me to come conduct his orchestra at the Colburn School also in two weeks. It'll be great, both of the orchestras play in SUCH great halls. The SB Youth Symphony is now at the Hahn Hall at the Music Academy of the West, and the Colburn orchestra is at the Zipper Hall, which is where Deutsche Grammophon records their L.A. recordings.
The newest addition to my music making this year is the Nova String Quartet. No, we did not name ourselves--Professor Rutkowski did. Tracy and I are manning the violins, Alex Chang on the viola and Aaron Bullard on the cello. It's been a lot of fun. We're working on Schubert's Rosamunde quartet this quarter. It is such a beautiful work. And as much I love playing in the quartet, it's a lot of work on top of my piano solo works and my conducting assignments. It doesn't help that I spent at least 10-15 hours preparing for my bibliography class each week. But I'm not complaining because I LOVE Professor Hsu. We used to call her "Empress Hsu" back in the day... and she REALLY is! She knows just about everything about... EVERYTHING. I've never met a more brilliant woman in my life! Luckily I love the research topics I'm working on for this class. This past week I had to write about all the major biographies of Mahler. The more I researched, the more I came to hate Alma Mahler. Mainly for the fact that she distorted so much of the history on Mahler. Then I ran into her again while reading Burton's Bernstein's bio last night. Apparently she even made a pass at Lenny! She was in her 70s!!!
Schubert's B-flat major sonata is one of the most rewarding pieces I've ever worked on. I used to dislike the last 2 movements. I take it back. I love them too now. :) |
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| Strange visitors... |
[Oct. 18th, 2008|01:50 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | BRAHMS 2 VPO KLEIBER | ] |
Last night several of my friends and I gathered to celebrate the first day of my 24th year (or would that be 25th?) and as we were getting drunk listening to Messiaen's Turangalîla-Symphonie, right outside the window a bunch of different birds showed up and started to sing along. It was a strange occurrence because according to Cornelius, birds NEVER show up outside his window, let alone past midnight! We sat there amazed at their chirping, we joked that perhaps that was Messiaen's spirit that came back to visit us in form of a bird. That certainly was the highlight of the day. |
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| Lasting words... oh what beauty... |
[Oct. 8th, 2008|11:54 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  exhausted | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Bach-Busoni -- Ich ruf zu dir, Herr Jesu Christ BWV 639 -- Alfred Brendel, Piano | ] |
I came across the following quote today while researching for my bibliography course:
It is the fate of those who toil at the lowest employments of life, to be rather driven by the fear of evil, than attracted by the prospects of good; to be exposed to censure, without hope of praise; to be disgraced by miscarriage, or punished for neglect, where success would have been without applause, and diligence without reward. Among these unhappy mortals is the writer of dictionaries …. Every other author may aspire to praise; the lexicographer can only hope to escape reproach, and even this negative recompense has been yet granted to very few.
-- Samuel Johnson's preface to Dictionary (1755)
I came across another quote that made me stop and reflect while reading Bernstein bio last night:
"Finally, the great conductor must not only make his orchestra play, he must make them want to play. He must exalt them, lift them, start their adrenaline pouring, either through cajoling or demanding or raging. But however he does it, he must make the orchestra love the music as he loves it. It is not so much imposing his will on them like a dictator; it is more like projecting his feelings around him so that they reach the last man in the second violin section. And when this happens--when one hundred men share his feelings, exactly, simultaneously, responding as one to each rise and fall of the music, to each point of arrival and departure, to each little inner pulse--then there is a human identity of feeling that has no equal elsewhere. It is the closest thing I know to love itself."
-- Leonard Bernstein
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| time to get in the zone |
[Sep. 27th, 2008|11:32 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  excited | ] |
| [ | music |
| | SHOSTAKOVICH OP. 87 KEITH JARRETT | ] |
A lot of work to be done, but a lot of EXCITING work... that's how I feel tonight after a whole day of running around making gazillions of copies for the orchestra, auditioning people, signing people in, etc. I am SO tired right now. I was at the music building from 9 AM til 9 PM working nonstop minus one short lunch break. My joints are actually sore... especially my knee. I haven't felt this kind of soreness in awhile. How is this possible? I'm only 23... I must've spent about 6 hours in that copy room.
Several things to think about.
I didn't have such a productive summer. It was a difficult summer in many ways, but now that I'm back in a familiar element I feel much better. Our conductor suggested couple things to me today that really got me pumped up. He suggested that I apply for the Aspen conducting program this summer instead of shooting for only the Pierre Monteux School. He also told me I should conduct from the keyboard some time. Told me to learn a Beethoven or a Mozart concerto... does that mean he'll let me conduct the university orchestra? I don't know. Either way, I absolutely love both of his suggestions and whether it happens or not any time soon, I'm totally excited to work for it. I know both are somewhat over my head, but it's something to shoot for. I hate being doubtful all the time and finding ways to limit myself... it's really counterproductive. Ever since I came to UCSB, I've been doing a lot of that. It takes the sail out my love for music. It really does. Back in high school I used to think anything was possible, and I just went for it. While I didn't get everything I wanted done, I achieved many things that most people weren't able to. There's a danger in knowing too much some times, you set a limitation on your abilities. But in all seriousness what bad could come out of shooting for something that I would love to work for?
I think I FINALLY found a third piece to round out my recital program. I'm thinking about Shostakovich's Op. 87. Either one or two preludes & fugues... I think they're such fun works and perhaps even neglected works. No one ever plays them. I'm really liking the ones in G major and D major. They're a bit quarky, but there's a certain childish charm to them. I think they would make a wonderful opening for the program before the Barber sonata. I could just turn my first half into a 20th century fest, and end with a warm and profound 2nd half with the Schubert B-flat. I think that really works out well... I really hate the idea of opening the program with a Haydn sonata or learning the entire Debussy Estampes. |
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| invading UCSB... |
[Sep. 26th, 2008|11:33 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | SCHUBERT B-FLAT D960 | ] |
Last night, Tracy and I ran around campus until 1 in the morning posting flyers and posters for the UCSB Symphony auditions... we raided every corner of the campus from engineering building to the physics building... I'm hoping out of about 40 posters we put up, we can get at least 10 more people to join. If we can do that, then we've done our job. I know we'll get at least 60 people in the orchestra this year. So with these flyers we should get to minimum of 70. My goal is to get 80 people into this orchestra by the winter quarter. Then eventually 90-100 by the spring quarter. We have over 20 thousand students on this campus, how is it possible that we can't squeeze out ONE decent ensemble??? This is a top tier research institution, there MUST be AT LEAST 300 people at UCSB who have played in quality youth symphonies before coming to college. I know there are at least 20 people each year who has interest in joining, but find out that the orchestra is not on par with the LA Philharmonic, so they decide not to audition... if all those 20 people actually joined, we'd have a solid full symphony. I blame this kind of campus-wide disinterest on our unenthusiastic and poorly-funded music department. So I took it upon myself to get a flashy poster made with some expert photoshop help from Adam Kurihara... and now we got posters hangin' everywhere. Even on the doors of the clean room labs. In the past, the music department put up lame flyers up only around the music building. I always wondered what the point of that was... as if the music majors didn't know about the orchestra... HMM. IDIOTS.
I think before next quarter starts, I will go post at least 100-200 posters. This place will be raining with photos of our orchestra all over the place. Once we can get up to 90-100 people, we'll be able to play bigger rep, and not sound like ass. It's difficult to pull off a big symphony with only 6-8 people in the 1st violin. You hear individual strings and if one person messes up, you hear it clear as night and day. It would be ideal to have at least 14-16 in the 1st, same with other sections. There's nothing worse in orchestral playing than to hear a tiny string section with each player playing in different pitch. YUCK. I leave this place in 2 years, but before I leave I will do what I can to turn things around for our orchestra. Once we establish ourselves as a respectable ensemble, people will come on their own. And before you know it, we'll be attempting Mahler's 4th.
Well, hopefully... |
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| Dear Isla Vista, PLEASE STFU AND GTFO |
[Sep. 20th, 2008|09:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | annoyed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | HIP HOP BULLSHIT | ] |
I have an 8 hour all comprehensive exam on Monday that I'm trying to study for. My next door neighbors are blasting their super loud heavy bass as always. It's so loud and powerful that my walls are actually vibrating--you can actually SEE my wall vibrating. I can feel the bass penetrating, shaking my bones. I feel NUMB listening to this for hours, every single night when they blast this disgusting noise which they call music. How they even have the nerve to play music this loud is beyond me. I know what it's like to have the desire to play music loud... but this is disgustingly loud. I highly doubt they can even hear themselves talk in their apartment. It's a tiny little one bedroom apartment they're living in... how loud do they really need it?
It's 9:30 PM on Saturday night and I'm in my bathroom with a chair set up trying to study. It's the only place in my apartment where the bass is quiet enough for me to handle. I can't read in my own room because I get a headache with the damn bass. I've already complained twice to them directly and once to the management. But it occurs on everyday basis. How is this not illegal? I should not have to be sitting in my bathroom for 3 hours reading this god awful textbook. It doesn't help that the guys next door are both huge body builders who get drunk and violent every weekend... I hear them cussing in middle of the night, breaking things, and I'm not about to walk over and start a fight. People have been beaten to death in this town by these neanderthals.
I cannot wait to get my ass out of this shithole. It's true, this town IS the Bangladesh of America. |
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| I hate reading... for exams... |
[Sep. 19th, 2008|11:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  grouchy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | ravi shankar | ] |
Can I be a little honest here? I hate reading and memorizing all this music history stuff... I realize how important it is to know but honestly my brain gets bored to death reading about madrigals and why and how the counterpoint came to be. I'd much rather read about the lifespan of a star or formation of the planetary orbits or at least about those blackass holes. That stuff I can get excited about... but this HISTORY on Monteverdi and castrato singers... I mean really, WHO CARES? I love the music making aspect of being a musician, but I don't get what the big fuss is about all this musicology drama... I don't get how a "failed musician" turns to musicology. Makes no sense to me. This stuff is NOT exciting. Seriously, go into neurology or physics or something if you're going to be a book worm. Save yourself from a lifelong pursuit of endless boredom. PLEASE. And don't tell me you can't be a great interpreter of Brahms because you don't know Monteverdi. I will find you and do evil things to your forehead... or something. |
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| a day to remember |
[Sep. 11th, 2008|11:08 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | mahler | ] |
I had a rough day today. Life nearly hit rock bottom. There are problems coming at me from all angles. Major problems. I'm battling too many problems at once and I have no choice but to put up a fierce fight... it's been emotionally difficult for me. My school year is in jeopardy, my funding is up in the air, immigration status is still a question mark, many of my close friends have moved out from SB, and my brother is not well at all, in fact i found out today he's on a suicide watch. It doesn't help that my mom has no clue how to deal with his illness and only makes things worse by saying things that hurt the situation. And she's obviously tired from everything... she's constantly on the verge of breaking down herself. I know she has the best intentions, so it's frustrating for me to see. I try to do what I can to help her understand. I try to keep a positive mindset and do only what helps the situation, but it is extremely difficult. I'm in San Diego with my family right now doing what I can. I had a long meeting with the team of doctors and staff who look after my brother today... there are some really selfless people out there, that's all I have to say. I sincerely hope that things do work out sooner than later... tomorrow is Kyle's 17th birthday. |
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| Back to making music! |
[Aug. 26th, 2008|09:30 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hopeful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Haydn Piano Sonatas Maestro Brendel | ] |
I'm happy to announce that my left elbow has healed enough for me to play once again! Last time I tried to play, I started hurting about 15 minutes into playing, so I stopped... but that was about 2 weeks ago. Today I went back for the first time since then and spent a good 2 to 3 hours practicing. I felt no ill effects and I'm happy to say that I'll be going back tomorrow for some more... and perhaps try to increase my practicing hours to about 4 to 6. Eventually by the time school year starts, I should be as good as new.
I think my program is set...
Haydn Piano Sonata in e minor, H. 16/34
Barber Piano Sonata, Op. 26
Schubert Piano Sonata in B-flat major, D. 960
I still haven't decided on the order. It's an awkward program to be honest. Dr. Chuckster suggested I go with Haydn-Schubert-intermission-Barber. But it feels strange putting Schubert in the first half, plus it would be a lopsided program with about an hour on the front and only 25 minutes on the back end... so I think I'll go with Haydn-Barber-intermission-Schubert. But I'm still not sure. Blah... I haven't started on the Haydn yet, so I could always take that out and replace it with something French. But do I really want to? No. Haydn would take me a week to learn. I don't want to spend a month on the Images or Estampes. |
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| feeling empty |
[Aug. 25th, 2008|09:05 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | calm | ] |
| [ | music |
| | mahler iv mtt | ] |
my family just left my apartment... they came to visit for 2 nights, and it's probably one of the most successful visits we've had in the last few years... i actually had fun throughout their stay, which is unusual because of all the shit that happens with the fam... and as always i felt this empty sadness watching them leave.
i think i see them on average 10-15 days out of the year. it's really strange to think that this is how it is... nothing happened the way i imagined growing up. things are really tough. things have been tough for so long, and to be honest i don't see too bright of a future for our family. it's hard for me to see it unfold this way especially because i lead my own life here in santa barbara... i almost feel guilty. i feel an enormous pressure to do well (financially) and help them out of this hell hole. it's too bad i'm going to be struggling myself if i continue to pursue my musical career. i found out last night that my mom will be filing for bankruptcy for her business from few years back... the one that fell apart when my brother became ill. i spent my entire summer in 2004, helping her set up this business... i feel sick when i think about how much shit has happened since then.
i have nothing to complain about. i consider myself to be unbelievably lucky. i've been given ALL the tools i need to accomplish what i want in life. i just need to keep pushing and hope that things will work out for me. to be honest, all my depression and sadness comes from my family situation. i get stuck when i think about them and how they must be living every day. and i fantasize about how things would be today if everything had worked out relatively okay.
even though they're the ones who have it rough, somehow i suffer with them... and i cry for them on the inside, not that it does them any good. my mom's not perfect, i know that... but i've never met anyone like her before. she's fragile in so many ways, yet in other ways she's the toughest rock i've ever come across. i admire her courage and her will power to stand by her son, doing everything within her limitation to support him. i just wished i too was there for my brother on everyday basis. how my mom stays content and optimistic despite all the shit, i'll never find out... but i'm glad she hasn't given up.
i tell myself that if everything does work out one day i'll be the happiest human being to ever walk on this planet. |
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| losing memory |
[Aug. 21st, 2008|11:50 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Bach Violin Concerti Hahn | ] |
it has come to my attention that my short term memory is starting to slip... it used to be crystal clear... now i sometimes forget what i JUST did... even things I did 30 seconds ago.
while this is nothing to be alarmed about, i'm still scared.
my eyes are getting really bad as well... i hate going to concerts now because all i see are blurred faces far away.
on the plus side, my fracutred elbow has improved quite a bit... i hope in a week i can go back to making music!
i don't like cooking meat. i don't want to do it anymore, doesn't feel right and the smell bothers me. i'll cook meat once in awhile, but i'm staying away from pork and beef. |
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| DESKTOP SEXINESS |
[Aug. 5th, 2008|01:23 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  pleased | ] |
| [ | music |
| | WAGNER THE GOLDEN RING SOLTI | ] |
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| Fracture of the Mind |
[Jul. 28th, 2008|01:16 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | apathetic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | MAHLER VI MTT SFS | ] |
It has been QUITE a year. Maybe not so much in terms of accomplishments on paper or in standings (especially since I've achieved nothing), but in the way my mind has come together in my attempt at understanding what life is. My little obsession with the cosmos has sparked and unlocked many of my curiosities. It has rounded up my knowledge of biology (or what little info I may have gathered in my head over the years), anthropology, psychology, and history to help me connect all these dots I didn't think were related in any way maybe a decade ago. I view and react differently to the life I live, and I have better understanding of what is important and real to my existence. I often see right through things that I didn't, maybe before my college years. Subsequently, it has allowed me to let go and accept many aspects of my life. I've learned so much about what it is to be human in this past year, and the animal side of who and what we are. To think that we have these phenomenal brains, yet we cannot let go of our instincts and biological needs, so much that we are controlled more by the rules embedded within us, rather than our own rational mind.
In many ways though, I think I have lost many of the "normal" views that most people have in the year of 2008. I see things much more objectively for what they are, rather than adding the human romanticism to everything (which often distort and ultimately ruin what we have in front of us). It's not to say that I wasn't aware before... but now things have become MUCH clearer--I see the reasons behind our actions and thoughts. There are so many "traps" prepared for us to walk into, that we have no control over. It's nearly impossible to ignore the rules of being a human. There are too many side effects that eventually, we give in and indulge when we can. Looking at things for what they are allows us to take a step back to see the big picture, perhaps the ENTIRE picture. You see our place in the intricate world of life, from single celled organisms all the way to our super complex brains. We see how we've survived to this point, and what makes us go to war, hate others, and compete for survival. This somehow leads one to look at the human species from an outsider's point of view, and when I open my eyes, I see a child's play at play. Such silly world we live in... in so many cases, most people can see and understand what they're entangled in, with flaws and problems CLEARLY laid out in front of them, yet they cannot let go and change... what is it about change that we're so afraid of? It's how we're built I guess. We badly need the approval of others. We rely so much on each other, that sometimes the others' thought is more important to us than the thought of our own. We would rather do what everyone else is doing, even if we knew that something was off.... I know I am guilty of it too, but I still wonder... is it just pure ignorance? What could be more pathetic than to continue when you know you're wrong?
It's frustrating to me when I run into people who are so caught up in their lives, that they very much are stuck in their "tunnel vision". And find it "too much work" to look into their existence to think, wonder, and question. They have no clue how they fit into this puzzle, and are completely content with the trail of M&Ms they've been following their entire lives. Venturing off into the unknown can be scary, but it's much scarier to know that we could be unprepared because we haven't gone out and studied ALL we can. As far as we know, there's unlimited amount of knowledge to be absorbed, at least until the universe supposedly will start to shrink... errr...
(on a different *somewhat related* note: when the universe stops expanding, the universe supposedly will start shrinking, so apparently time will also go backwards... which means instead of being born as a baby, we'll appear on earth as shriveled up old men made up of nutrients and earth worms... we'll then come out of our coffins and start our lives as wise old men... then eventually become stupider each day to a point that one day we'll decide to crawl into our mothers' womb to die. that means when we have sex, it'll be the women who provide the men with the sperm... so does that also mean we'll eat through our anus and poop through our mouth? that means we'll have the ability to take in shit and somehow process them into wholesome yummy food through our body. just imagine... we'll basically lose weight by EATING. we may be eating shit. but still, i'm sure many people today would pay an arm and a leg in order to eat and lose weight. so at least we'll make SOME progress when we reach this point in time... wait a second...)
Perhaps the best quality of the human brain is that we are able to question and have curiosities, which lead us to the next stop in this crazy maze. We take what works, and move on. Eventually all the silly things we have today will no longer be here. Soon or later we will come to a realization on all things, even if it means one by one... therefore, what's to come is inevitable. Little by little our brains are working together to strive for perfection. Luckily for myself, I take comfort in that. It's good to know that we will look back and laugh at the things we did in year 2008, just the way we look back and laugh at ourselves for the way we were in year 2008 B.C. 4000 years is really nothing in scheme of all things. We're such young species. We're still technically toddlers (if there are such thing as intelligent beings elsewhere--which i'm damn sure there are). The wisest man on Earth is probably the equivalent of a retarded 2 year old alien on another planet. That, I also take comfort in. Somehow this allows me to accept that we're okay--at least it keeps me from becoming angry. It allows me to forgive and accept how stupid we are. It's all okay, as long as we continue to evolve (in the head) and eventually get to a point where we can make ends meet by pull things off efficiently.
I was totally going to write about my outlook on my next two years at UCSB, but it's actually past 3 AM and I need to get to bed. I have a physical therapy session in 7 hours. Yes, physical therapy. Blah. I have a fractured arm. Well, my left elbow to be specific. And to be even more specific, the radial head has a fracture. No it's not dislocated, so it's not THAT big of a deal, however it's annoying that I have no use of my left arm/hand and I have to pay money for therapy. How did this happen? Remember that backpacking trip I was on this past weekend? Yea... I slipped and fell while crossing a river. I had to jump rocks, and on one of them, it happened. It was tough backpacking in high elevation with that much weight on my back with a fractured arm and a cold... but hey, it happened and it was SO worth it. The views were to die for and I got to spend time with an excellent group of people. So it's all good.
on top of the glacier pass...
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| One of the best ones I've seen so far... hahaha |
[Jul. 17th, 2008|03:11 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sick | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Bach French Suites, Glenn Gould | ] |
Congratulations! I am happy to announce that you just won the First Prize of my company's initiation raffle. "Weites Land" is renowned outdoor travel consulting company. We offer service for active families and individuals, which are interested in experiencing the most authentic outdoor adventures. Your prize is a three day backpacking trip in the Sierra Nevada, California. It will leave tomorrow afternoon from Santa Barbara, so here are a few details of the trip and a list of things that you need to bring. From over 2000 applicants we choose the five friendliest and most competent hikers: - Anthony Kim (also known as "Group Leader Kim")
- Hamid Ghofrani (alias "The Persian Rocket")
- Philipp Schneider ("The Doc")
- Kristin Bergum ("The Racing Viking")
- Elijah Quetin ("The relentless Fisherman")
The expedition will be conducted by our most experienced tour guide Annelen Kahl (CEO, Founder and only guide of the company). She has climbed several summits in Europe and the US and most recently was awarded employee of the month. Transportation is sponsored by Subaru and Toyota.
The supply team is going shopping tonight. Breakfast will provided.
Hamid please contact the expedition leader if you wish to be included into the shopping. Essentials (that everybody will need to bring) - Sleeping back (it could go down to freezing but I don't expect it, so 30F sleeping back should be sufficient)
- Pad
- Sunscreen, sunglasses and hat
- Waterproof jacket (and pants if possible)
- Clothing to cover temp ranges 30F-90F
- Backpack (50L+)
- Good and comfortable shoes (hiking boots most preferred)
- Extra socks (we will have multiple river crossings)
- Water bottles to carry ~2liters
Doc, can we use your water filter and stove and pots?
Timeline: Friday: leave in the afternoon. Let's shoot for 3-4pm.
Drive to Mineral King (~5-6h) Saturday: Pick up Permits, Maps and Bear Cans and head out Sat-Mon: Hike, Hang out and enjoy! Since we have to be somewhat flexible with the route according to the permit situation, the exact distances aren't set yet, but I estimate a moderate 8-12 miles per day with elevation loss and gain around 1000-3000ft. There is a nice peak called Saw Tooth Peak, which I would like to visit on the way. Otherwise we will be around the timberline, so we will have rocky passes, lush forests and pretty lakes to swim in. Monday afternoon/evening: return to the cars and drive back to Santa Barbara Estimated Costs per person: - Gas: 2 cars*500miles/6people ~$40
- Food: ~$20
- Permit & Bear Cans: ~$8
= $68 (+Treats for the guide: ~$10)
If that sounds good to you, please send a confirmation email to:
weitesland@gmail.com I am looking forward to welcoming you as part of my first expedition! Annelen |
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| this ain't happenin again... |
[Jul. 11th, 2008|03:35 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  determined | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Stravinsky - Rite of Spring - Chicago Symphony, Seiji Ozawa | ] |
I just want to say no matter what happens, this time next year I am going to the Pierre Monteux School. I am beyond disappointed that I couldn't do anything this summer because of financial reasons... I could have AND should have done better to make sure that I had gone to the program at Medomak. It bothers me so much when I think about this missed opportunity. I have a number of friends from Bard last year who are now at Medomak, studying with Kiesler. And they're telling me all about their score study sessions. Makes me wanna puke.
In any case, I will try my best to finish learning my first master's recital program before school starts that way I can spend more time on conducting during the academic year... I gotta prepare for the audition DVD. The Monteux school covers over 60 major works over a period of 6 weeks. I couldn't imagine a better place for me right now...
Even though I can survive financially this year without taking any loans, I think I'm still going to take some money out anyway. That way I can save enough money to apply for summer programs. I'd rather pay later and do something. This summer's been a complete failure, having to cancel both the Medomak conducting program AND my camping trips. Being poor and depressed sucks.
On a brighter note, an impromptu backpacking trip is happening soon somewhere in the Sierra Nevada mountains... according to the excursion team, this WILL be the toughest hike of my life. We'll be hiking up so high that we'll be in freezing winter temperatures in the middle of July! And there's no water up there, so we're carrying EVERYTHING in! I cannot wait... I gotta get me some new hiking shoes!!!
I also just looked at the 2008-2009 concert season for the Los Angeles and Santa Barbara areas... I think I almost died looking at it. My TWO favorite orchestras are coming to town: San Francisco Symphony with MTT and the Vienna Philharmonic (with Mehta, YUCK!). Kissin and Argerich are coming as well. I get to see both of the upcoming Chinese sensations, Yuja Wang and Joyce Yang. Should be an interesting season. There are two newly rebuilt halls in SB that are being used for concerts next year... the Hahn Hall at the Music Academy of the West and the Granada Theater in downtown SB. The acoustics in both halls are SUPERIOR to the Arlington and the Lobero. FINALLY we have some decent halls in town!
Speaking of Hahn Hall, last night I had perhaps one of the most intense and gratifying musical encounters of my life... I was lucky enough to attend Christopher Taylor's performance of Messiaen's Vingt regards sur l'enfant Jesus. Yes. The whole thing. If this was 2 years ago, I probably would have written a complete entry on it. All I have to say is that I am speechless. I wasn't all that familiar with Messiaen going into the recital, but wow I am a changed man after hearing that performance. I have NEVER heard a more difficult piece in a recital before... I was in another world listening to Mr. Taylor rip through the piano... what harmonies! And the impossible machine gun rhythms!!! I had never seen such landscape in music... and what an utterly mind blowing performance it was! Mr. Taylor is a former student of Dr. Asche's, and I could only imagine how much fun it must've been to teach such a talent!
Today I went to go see a master class at the music academy given by Zvi Zeitlin-Warren Jones-Jerome Lowenthal trio, where I heard a lovely singer that moved me to tears... but the violinist and the pianist I heard were rather disappointing. I ESPECIALLY was not impressed by the pianist. He had a machine gun up his sleeve but no sensitivity whatsoever. He had no idea what to do with the Beethoven sonata, and he LOVED cutting through all the pauses as fast as possible. It sounded as if all he did was practice with the metronome because he kept to the meter like a madman, but that was pretty much it. Didn't help that he had multiple memory slips. Masterclasses can be a frightening experience... |
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| a memory from high school... |
[Jun. 29th, 2008|12:28 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | apathetic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | MAHLER IV SFS MTT | ] |
I remember sometime during my freshmen year in high school, a heated discussion took place in my world history class... I'm not quite sure how it got started, but we were discussing religions of the world, and at some point a spark flew off that began a giant pit of fire. Bunch of the Christian kids were talking about their religion (me being one of them), and there was this one particular girl who had a reply to almost everything we brought up about the religion... each time she questioned our statements, things became more and more heated. Before you knew it there was a very intense debate that split the class into two. Most of the students were religious in one way or another, and this outspoken atheist girl was somewhat cornered by the rest of the class... but she refused to back down, and continued to question all of us (mind you we were only 13 years old... but what heavy weight questions they were!) I was still a devout Catholic at the time, and it was right around this time that I started thinking about the religion more deeply than ever before... I remember being shocked and impressed by this girl... the questions she presented to the class were really beyond her years. I remember sitting there not being able to answer many of her questions, and found myself often agreeing with what she had to say, even though I was taught to think otherwise. Somehow she had an explanation for almost everything we brought up, and in turn we'd say something back to explain that she couldn't possibly be right... this went back and forth for a good 20-30 minutes. At some point our teacher stopped us by saying "actually guys, we're not supposed to talk about religion in class rooms, I just wanted to see where it would go, but it's getting out of hand and we should stop now." I remember the girl throwing her hands up in the air with a look of disgust in her face... we wanted the discussion to continue, well I certainly did.
That day in class I had heard things against my religion and my process of thought that I had never heard before. When you grow up religiously, you are naturally surrounded by those with similar beliefs. Chances are your entire family is religious, and so are most of your friends because you tend to become friends with people you can connect with, not to mention all your friends from church. Consequently, I see that many, if not most religious people grow up without running into much resistance. Our brain works in a way such that when there is no resistance or conflict to our process of thought, it tends to follow the regular patterns/behaviors because it is easy and it is comforting. Change to tradition, behavior, and patterns can be VERY disturbing to us. I guess what I'm saying is that there should be more discussions such as the one which took place in my freshmen history class. It's such a giant topic, and yet there's rarely a good discussion that ever goes on between the two sides; those who believe and those who don't... it's not to say that the non-religious people don't have some kind of belief in something outside of the Earth life. But at the same time, organized religions have no hard evidence of any kind to back up their thoughts and writings... that is why it is called "faith". At some point you do have to jump and believe that there is indeed an invisible rope off that cliff. What makes some of us jump and what keeps some of us on the ground? We don't have enough evidence to say either is right. Many people try to debunk either side through logic, but who's to say that logic is everything? It's hard to say... perhaps even impossible at this moment in time.
I'm sad that I don't really ever get to see good discussions between the two sides... most of the time I see it happen, it's more of a fight... the religious see the non-religious as an evil sinner whereas the non-religious see the religious as a brain-washed ignorant idiot. Of course that is an exaggeration, but more or less that is what I see. Especially on college campuses where the crazy fundamentalists show up with pickets screaming their heads off confronted by super duper anti-religious pigs. I can't say that I've had too many good discussions with large groups of people regarding this matter... I wished that this was more of an open discussion for everyone to participate in. I know that religious discussions are NOT allowed in school class rooms, and it's unfortunate. Because by the time you've hit college years, your mind is almost cemented and stuck. Most people have hard time letting go of their beliefs from previous years... this kind of hard core discussion and thought sharing should occur when our mind is still flexible. But who can blame the public school system? Most students wouldn't be able to hold a civil discussion if they tried, especially with so many incompetent teachers... in all seriousness though, what is more beautiful than openly sharing what we see and believe in? What good is your view/beliefs if you cannot defend it and/or see through it? Most people only get to see their OWN side and try (perhaps subconsciously) to surround themselves with those who will support the same cause and ideas... again, that is natural. That is what we do. But why? One of the most exciting things in life is to experience a shift in one's paradigm. Plus, if the shift does occur, whether you walk away from your religion or become more of a religious person after such discussion, then you are taking a step closer to what may be the truth.
Truth is that it is only year 2008... chances are many of the world's biggest religions will evolve over the years, perhaps even disappear and many of the scientific facts and super theories will become varied or even disintegrated entirely... the world continues to evolve in every way possible, and our views along with it. Our view of the universe is different from that of Aristotle's... even Christianity itself is very much of a different religion from centuries ago. Perhaps knowing this, we should keep in mind that nothing is forever... at least not yet. Nothing is impossible. Anything is possible. We should never fear the unknown. We should welcome it with open arms and a ginormous smile. |
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| oh Pyotr Ilyich... where would I be without you? |
[Jun. 14th, 2008|05:50 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sad | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Tchaikovsky Abbado Bernstein Mravinsky | ] |
I've never been so pissed and lonely in my life...
well, that's not true. I've had it much worse. I don't know what it is, but I'm just super emotional right now. I guess you can't avoid being who you are sometimes. Our brains have certain patterns to them, and no matter what at the end of the day, your brain ends up going back into its familiar territories. Even if they are traps that you don't want to fall into. I keep doing it to myself and I can't help it. Logic doesn't always win out... we have faulty brains. And unfortunately, some of us are more emotional than we should be. After dodging so many bullets and missiles (not always successfully) in my life, I've learned to build a strong shield. The shield comes into play day in day out, but today the shield isn't working so well. It's tough being in this situation. And when I'm this way, I don't want to practice or even look at a piano. Some people seem to enjoy playing when they're depressed. I honestly don't know how that works. Though fortunately for me, I am able to listen when I'm down. And that's my only solace right now... been listening to a lot of Tchaikovsky. A lot. Tempest and Francesca di Rimini. I love artists who understand what it is to be tormented. There is NOTHING better than suffering tormenting music. It feels beyond good to hear pain. I get off on it. There is nothing that can touch pain. Nothing.
Things aren't going so well for me. There are issues on multiple ends and I can't help but to feel pain for those who are in suffering--including myself. I'm not one of those people who can ignore other people's problem and somehow detach myself emotionally. If someone I love is in pain, then I too am in pain with them. Everything's just on the edge... and consequently, it has put ME on the edge. People are starting to annoy the hell out of me, and I keep seeing everyone's worst qualities. I wished I could just tell them to their faces that they're shallow and ignorant... and full of hate. Rather than trying to understand the person and the situation, there's a lot of harsh judgments. On the other hand, some people have soothing qualities to them... people with genuine warmth and loving souls. I always thought it was people who suffered themselves who would understand me the best. I miss being around Jacob and Matt sometimes. I remember Matt talking to me about how lonely he was... even though he was THE most loved of all our friends BY FAR... and I didn't quite understand how that could be. Today I understand him entirely and respect him immensely for his strength. Truly GOOD people are hard to come by. It's tough to live above the society's norms and demands. One has to constantly think and counter what comes at them in order to seek out the genuine from the superficial. That is a difficult task to manage, because it is impossible to separate oneself from the system entirely. Especially for people my age, because we constantly want to please our friends and impress our peers. We are immensely affected by those who we surround ourselves with.
I know that things will be alright with me and that this moment in time will pass. In the core I've always been a positive and content soul. I would even go far as saying that I'm actually a happy go lucky guy... if it wasn't for all this bull. Fortunately though, time does heal everything. Well, almost everything. But until then, I'm going to keep listening to Tchaikovsky and cry with him. |
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| Take 20 minutes. Listen. Do it. |
[May. 26th, 2008|02:45 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused & worried about life | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Maestro Abbado is the Greatest Tchaikovsky Interpreter of ALL time | ] |
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| My how the world turns! |
[May. 10th, 2008|05:21 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | BRAHMS I & III CHICAGO SYMPHONY SOLTI | ] |
Four years ago if you asked me to rank the Brahms symphonies, I would have told you...
II & IV (tie) -- I -- III
Today I feel quiet different...
III -- I -- IV -- II
It's also possible that the more Brahms I hear, the MORE LOVE I have for him. I learned to love the 2nd symphony when I was still in 2nd grade. I got into the 4th next, then the 1st, and finally I got into the 3rd in the last couple years. Now I'm convinced the third is the best.
Ask me again in 4 years and the rank might be turned upside down once again!
Right now I can't get enough of Solti's precision and clarity. LOVE it. |
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| The Golden Season |
[Apr. 18th, 2008|11:55 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | excited | ] |
| [ | music |
| | PROKOFIEV 7 | ] |
 I was going to write about the 2007-2008 season myself, but I just came across this article which captures all my thoughts and feelings so well... what a season it has been...
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| oh religion... |
[Apr. 15th, 2008|01:13 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  anxious | ] |
| [ | music |
| | more Brahms please... | ] |
I'm on CNN right now watching the pope walk down from his airplane, greeting President Bush and some of his Catholic comrades... it looks awfully similar to the scene from the Return of the Jedi when Emperor Palpatine arrives on Death Star II greeted by Lord Vader and the storm troopers. In fact, the Catholic arch bishops look way too much like the Emperor's royal guards (with all that red and black), and Bush reminds me a bit of Admiral Jerjerrod... because he's not cool enough to be Vader. When will this madness end? Empire eventually fell... when will organized religions be gone?
Watching this kind of ridiculous and unnecessary fanfare for ONE man made me realize we need to focus more on education in this country and put more thought into thought. Sometimes "tradition" can be our worst enemy. We should learn from mother nature and learn to evolve. Not just physically but mentally. |
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| The Persistence of Memory |
[Mar. 28th, 2008|01:43 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | calm | ] |
| [ | music |
| | VAUGHAN WILLIAMS - FANTASIA ON A THEME OF THOMAS TALLIS - SLATKIN & ST. LOUIS | ] |
There is nothing more tragic than losing a memory. What are we without our memories? Memories are all we have of our past. Without a past, what is a future? There would be no point in living without memories... there would be no cause and effect. Luckily we have more than one way of keeping our memories intact through photos, videos, diaries, friends, etc. However the best memories are the ones you only remember inside of your mind without the help of photos and videos. I don't know why that is... but for some reason I always seem to savor those memories the most. I'm always afraid that once I remember something from long ago, I'll lose it forever... I feel the need to write them down somewhere... memories are so precious, without them we are nothing. We become nothing more than a functioning robot.
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| The Korean Dilemma... aka Our Dilemma... |
[Mar. 25th, 2008|12:10 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | irritated | ] |
| [ | music |
| | PROKOFIEV ROMEO & JULIET SFS MTT | ] |
I'm fairly critical of the Korean culture and its people. It's not so much that I dislike the Korean people, or that I hate my own culture... but having grown up in Korea, I understand all too well what it is to be a Korean and the thought process behind the Korean mind. Now that I live in the U.S. and have become "Americanized" in some sense, I see the Korean flaws and issues all too well.
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| TeH BiG SuR |
[Mar. 24th, 2008|04:10 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | SIBELIUS SYMPHONY NO. 1 PHILADELPHIA ORMANDY | ] |
Big Sur was GREAT. The view was spectacular and quite dramatic. The drive up along the coast was simply epic. We must've heard at least 12 concertos and 8 symphonies! The stonehouse was a delight and our day hikes were beautiful. I wished I could've stayed for longer, but there's a lot of work to be done this spring break... so I'm now back in SB. First thing I checked when I got home was my email, and I was delighted to see that Ken Kiesler had sent me a message. I got accepted to his summer program for conductors in Medomak, Maine. I replied telling him that I plan to show up in July... but as of right now, I'm $4000 short. So I don't know how I'm gonna pull it off. :/ I'll have to think of something... fast...
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| NIGERIAN FRAUD ANYONE!?!? |
[Mar. 19th, 2008|03:22 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | SWINGLE SINGERS | ] |
I just got this in my e-mail from "Morgan Wale" aka "honest2morgan@yahoo.com"...
-------------------------
Hello Teacher,
Glad to tell you that,my son will be coming to the United State for holiday.Will be more than glad if you can teach him everyday from 2pm-3pm or your suitable time(1 hour per day from Monday-Friday for two weeks making a total of ten lessons,teach him on your field of knowledge.If you can make it,kindly get back to me with the cost of your teaching for two weeks in the dates of April 1st -15th.He will be coming to your house for 1 hour each day for two weeks.I have someone that will always drive him down to your house His name john,he is 13 years old. I will want you to calculate 1 hour per day from Monday-Friday for the whole 2 weeks and get back to me.Looking forward to read from you
-------------------------
i smell somethin' funny... don't u? |
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| ... |
[Mar. 8th, 2008|12:41 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | MUSICALLY TURNED ON | ] |
| [ | music |
| | ANYTHING MENDELSSOHN!!!!! | ] |
what is wrong with me...
i'm starting to really like murray perahia. the world must be turning upside down. at least he was never under the same category as ashkenazy, barenboim, and karajan. i guess it was expected. 4 words. mendelssohn. songs. without. words. actually add one more to that. bach. i'm pretty sure i put him above schiff.
i still think he is a cold pianist though. |
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